Month: July 2017

Leadership, Our Blog

The One Thing that Helped Me Move to a New Professional Level

T. M. T.

By Tasha M. Troy

I’m sure we all know someone who is never satisfied with simply doing a good job; they have to reach higher and go “above and beyond the call of duty.”  In fact, that might be you!

Even as a child, I had a drive to excel, stemming in part from a perfectionist tendency in my personality.  I have been fortunate to be surrounded with people with similar drives for most of my life.

 

The Pain of Discontent

However, just a few years ago, I was no longer content with the reach of my influence.  I wanted more.

  • After coaching hundreds of training participants to give presentations, I wanted to give my own presentations.
  • After training clients in negotiation strategies, I wanted to help those people in my life who needed the same training.
  • After helping trainees gain a greater clarity in cross-cultural situations, I wanted to expand my circle and help even more people gain that clarity.

 

I decided to take my personal and professional development to a new level.  I am an avid reader, so of course I started reading up in the areas of leadership, influence, and negotiation, but I wasn’t always able to implement that learning in my environment.

I had been in a particular role at work for several years, and it appeared that I had grown to the extent that my environment would allow. When I reached the end of my own ability to grow where I was, the tension I felt caused that hunger I felt to become even stronger.

That’s when I decided to hire a personal career coach.

 

Benefits of Coaching

While working with a personal coach didn’t make all the obstacles disappear, it did help me gain perspective and stop overthinking decisions.  Through my growing awareness in the coaching sessions, I gained the confidence to push out of my comfort zone and to step out into new areas.  I haven’t looked back.

In fact, one of the first things I learned through being coached was how much coaching I did with those who report to me.  I often believe in their potential before they do, and it is one of my greatest joys to guide them into living from a place of strength and confidence.

Today, as I continue to work with a coach, the partnership serves me in several ways:

  • It provides an outside perspective for making decisions.
  • It serves as a sounding board and creative thinking partner for thinking through projects.
  • It challenges my assumptions when trying to make sense of situations.
  • It reminds me of my accomplishments when I feel bad about my progress.
  • It provides accountability as I am pursing my goals.

 

Is Coaching for You?

Coaching isn’t for everyone.  Many people are discontented with their situation and want to see things change.  However, I believe it was Tony Robbins who said that “change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.”  Until you reach that threshold, change will not happen.  Have you?

If you have been reading my blog and felt a growing desire to move forward in the areas of professional communication, leadership, and intercultural intelligence skills, I invite you to explore what a coaching partnership could mean for you.

 

Take It Deeper

Sometimes it’s hard to know where to start.  If you would like to go deeper on this topic, I hold free exploratory coaching sessions each week.  You can register online at Troy Communications or email me to schedule an appointment at TMTroy@TroyCommunications.Net

If you enjoyed this article and would like to receive these monthly posts in your inbox, you can subscribe at Troy Communications Blog.

To learn more about executive or career coaching, check out this article from the Harvard Business Review:  What Coaches Can Do for You.

 

Cultural Intelligence, Interpersonal Communication, Our Blog

A Blueprint for Cross-cultural Communication

T. M. T.

By Tasha M. Troy

In 2001, I made one of the biggest, most impactful changes of my life; I moved to South Korea and stayed there for just over eight years.

While in Korea, I grew in so many ways:

  • I discovered my niche student population.
  • I learned how to connect with my students, drawing out the quiet ones and reining in the overly talkative ones.
  • I developed key strategies for interacting with my Korean students, managers, and friends as well as my remarkably diverse language faculty colleagues.
  • I broadened my experience and deepened my understanding of different countries and their cultures.

 

I achieved a modest level of professional success, and I became very confident in my skills.

 

New Adventure

In 2009, I made another of the biggest, most impactful decisions; I moved back to the US.

I came back to the US feeling that I was now an expert with unique skills.  While this was true to an extent, I still had some hard lessons to learn.  While the basic demographics of my students were largely the same as my last few years in Korea, my classes were now quite culturally diverse, with no more than two students from the same country and no more than four speaking the same language.

Furthermore, the students used a communication style that I had become unaccustomed to.

 

A Communication Blueprint

You see, what I didn’t realize was that there are three general cultural communication styles, according to Susan Steinbach, who uses three sports metaphors to describe these styles:

  • Rugby – a loud style that involves a lot of “talking over” each other and frequently interrupting each other. It is very physically demonstrative and seems chaotic to an outside observer.  This style is used in South America, the Middle East, the Mediterranean nations, and most of Africa.
  • Bowling – a quiet style that involves each speaking clearly getting their own turns to speak with little or no interruption. It seems very reserved and orderly to an outside observer.  This style is used primarily in East Asia and Northern Europe.
  • Basketball – a moderately loud and somewhat fast-paced style that includes limited interruptions. It seems lively and relatively (though not perfectly) ordered to an outside observer.  This style is used in the US and Central and Western Europe.

 

The bowling style of Korea suited my personality, which helps explain why I was so comfortable living in S. Korea.  However, I now had several students from the Middle East and Africa, and my classroom gave me culture shock; I felt like someone had taken me off a bowling alley and thrown me onto a rugby pitch!

 

Moving Forward

It was my openness to learning, adapting, and growing that enabled me to come through those first years back in the US stronger and better able to connect with students from all communication style backgrounds.

Today, I know that many people face cross-cultural communication situations regularly, if not daily, and I know that there are many miscommunications that create tension and conflict.

  • Is it possible that you are misreading someone in your personal circle, whether at work or at home?
  • Are you misinterpreting intentions?
  • Are you giving the wrong impression?

 

If you want to connect with those around you, especially if they are hard to connect with, it is time to do a little self-examination and recalibrate your perceptions.

 

Take It Deeper

Sometimes it’s hard to know where to start.  If you would like to go deeper on this topic, I hold free exploratory coaching sessions each week.  You can register online at Troy Communications or email me to schedule an appointment at TMTroy@TroyCommunications.Net

If you enjoyed this article and would like to receive these monthly posts in your inbox, you can subscribe at Troy Communications Blog.

 

 

 

Cultural Intelligence, Leadership, Our Blog

The Magic Key to Influence

T. M. T.

By Tasha M. Troy

How often do you open up to someone who clearly isn’t interested in your perspective?  For me, it is never.  That is why showing “mutual respect” is one of my foundational values.

For many years, my classrooms have had a high level of cultural diversity.  That’s the nature of the field of teaching I went into.  At one point, out of a class of 12 or 15 students, I had 8 or 9 languages and nationalities and at least 3 religions represented.

Respect in the Classroom

In order to create a flourishing learning community, I have to establish mutual respect.

As the instructor, I set the example for respect:

  • I respect their time by not assigning “busy work.”
  • I respect their personal goals, as distinct from the training program goals.
  • I respect the time and effort they have already invested to achieve whatever level of success they’ve achieved.

In turn, I expect them to respect me as their instructor and to trust my judgment and expertise, and I expect them to respect each other for who they are.

Respect in the Real World

Outside the teaching environment, I continue to endeavor to live out this value of respect.

  • When a friend makes an outlandish comment, I ask for clarification before challenging their assumptions.
  • I accept that people think differently and have dramatically different perspectives from me, and I can accept that they are still good people regardless of our point of disagreement.
  • I recognize that my priorities are not another’s priorities, and I choose not to get upset by that.
  • I choose not to take it personally when someone attacks a belief or position I hold. (Ok, I’m still working on this one!)

When we start from a place of respect, we open the door to progress on the issues that matter most to us.

We all come to the issues of our day from different perspectives, by different routes.  We must respect the journey others have taken if we want to have influence with them.

 

Take It Deeper

Sometimes it’s hard to know where to start.  If you would like to go deeper on this topic, I hold free exploratory coaching sessions each week.  You can register online at Troy Communications or email me to schedule an appointment at TMTroy@TroyCommunications.Net

If you enjoyed this article and would like to receive these monthly posts in your inbox, you can subscribe at Troy Communications Blog.